What are you focusing on? This is one of the most important questions you could answer for yourself.
You see, we are motivated by either toward motivators or away from motivators. So what do I mean by that? Well, when you’re motivated toward something, it means that you’re moving towards what you want. And when you’re motivated away from what you don’t want, it means your attention has to be focused on what you don’t want.
This is the problem.
Let’s use money as an example. So, someone might say they’re motivated to make more money because they want to buy their dream home and they want to be a millionaire, or whatever. Now, those are pretty much towards motivators. At least they sound that way so far. But what if they say “it’s because I don’t want to be poor.” They’re motivated to make more money because they don’t want to be poor. Or, maybe they say “I want to make more money because I want to have enough to get by” That’s moving away from what they don’t want which is poverty or not having enough.
Whenever someone is talking about what they want or what’s important to them in a certain area of life, (in this example, what’s important to them about making more money) and they use the word “don’t”, or any negatives, or if there’s a comparison, that’s a pretty good clue that it’s an away from motivator. And this is where it becomes a problem.
Now, you might be thinking “why is this a problem? They’re still motivated, so what’s the difference? Why does that matter if it’s towards or away?”
Well, if you’re motivated toward something, you will continually be motivated towards it until you get it. It’s powerful. When you’re motivated away from what you don’t want, the further away you get from it, the less motivated you are. As soon as you start moving away from what it is you don’t want, the motivation decreases.
I’ll give you another example. Let’s talk about someone who’s working to release weight. You probably know someone or you’ve heard of someone, (or maybe you are someone) who at some point in the past may have tried out a diet and it worked for a bit and then they lost motivation fell off track and went right back to eating the old way, and following the old habits, until they got motivated to try again and maybe tried a different fad diet or maybe the same one, it doesn’t matter. Then they started going to the gym again, started doing the things that they needed to do, until they started to see some results again, got a little more comfortable, lost their motivation and repeated the cycle all over again.
This is really typical of someone who is motivated away from. In this example they may be motivated away from obesity or away from buying plus-sized clothes. Maybe they’re motivated away from feeling tired and sluggish, or they’re motivated away from what they see in the mirror.
As many of you know, I used to work in the fitness industry. So I know that a lot of personal trainers and people in that industry use away from motivators to try to motivate their clients. And this is no fault on them. They don’t know what they don’t know. They think they’re motivating them correctly, but really what’s happening is that they say, things like, “you need to lose weight because you don’t want to have high blood pressure”, or “you need to lose weight because you don’t want to have a heart attack or cancer,” whatever it is. And they think those are strong motivators, but the second that person starts to feel a little healthier, their blood pressure comes down, their blood sugar normalizes, they can walk up the stairs with ease, they lose the motivation. So it’s not a sustainable motivation. It doesn’t move them forward all the way to the goal.
That’s the problem with away from motivators. And that’s the typical cycle.
- The person’s motivated
- Then as they make progress and get further away from the thing they don’t want, they lose their motivation, and we call that burn out. That’s when burnout happens. They lose interest and they lose motivation. They don’t feel like doing it anymore.
- Then they create a drama to become motivated again.
In the case of the weight loss, the person will become motivated again when the doctor tells them their blood pressure is too high again. Or when their pants are too tight again. Or when they’re out of breath walking up the stairs again. Whatever it is, and then they’ll have a little freak out about it, they’ll get upset, they’ll get motivated, they’ll start walking, they’ll start eating better, they’ll do the things that they know they need to do until they start to feel better and then they fall off again.
Here’s a fun fact: You have ninety thousand thoughts in a day. Ninety thousand! Give or take a few. How many of those do you think are towards what you want and how many are away from? Do you have any idea? Because you’d be surprised at how many people are motivated away from what they don’t want and they don’t even realize that they’re focusing on what they don’t want. Until they work with someone like me and we figure out that’s what’s going on.
And that’s why they’re not reaching their goals.
So, it’s really important to be motivated towards what you do want and not away from what you don’t want.
How do you do that? We start by letting go of past negative emotions and limiting decisions during the Personal Breakthrough process.
Imagine how much more productive you and your team will be when all of you are moving toward your goals will laser sharp focus. What would that do for your results?