Uncover Imposter and Unleash Excellence
[00:00:00] Do you ever feel like you're an impostor? Even though you have so much evidence to the contrary, you know intellectually that you're not an impostor, and yet you still have that underlying fear that one day they are going to find out that you are a fraud. If this sounds like you, Welcome to imposter syndrome.
So in this episode, we're going to talk about imposter syndrome, what it is, where it comes from, and I'm going to give you some ways of reframing it or thinking about it a little bit differently and some tools you can use to help you overcome it.
what is imposter syndrome? It is that critic that lurks in the background of your mind that tells you that no matter what you have done, no matter what you have achieved, that it's not good enough, that you're not good enough, and that they are going to find out who they are. I have no [00:01:00] idea. First of all, let's talk about that name, imposter syndrome.
I'm not a big fan of that name because it implies that there's something wrong with you. Imposter Syndrome. Well, you're not sick. You don't have a disease. It's not a syndrome, but the symptoms of Imposter Syndrome, how it makes us feel, is very real and very valid. So I wish we had a different name for it, but...
We don't. So we'll call it what it is, imposter syndrome, but all the while, just know that's kind of misleading and not really the right name to describe what it is that we experience when we experience what we call imposter syndrome.
Now, maybe you have heard of the Dunning Kruger effect. This came out of research by David Dunning and Justin Kruger from Cornell University in 1999. And they were studying the effects of competency and [00:02:00] confidence and how people would rate themselves in terms of how competent they are. What they found was really interesting.
They found that people with just a little bit of knowledge over, grossly overestimated their skill level or their competency. So people who knew a little bit on the subject really thought that they knew a lot and knew all there was to know. And then they found that people on the other end of the spectrum who had a lot of knowledge, these are the people who are the experts, often doubt that they know enough.
It's kind of like the people who didn't know a lot didn't know enough to know that they didn't know enough. And the people with a lot of knowledge and expertise knew enough to know that they'll never know everything there is. And there we get imposter syndrome. So if you're experiencing imposter syndrome, the first thing to know is [00:03:00] that it's kind of a good sign.
It's kind of a good sign that maybe you really are an expert, or you're at least well ahead of the curve in terms of knowledge on the subject at hand. The thing about imposter syndrome is that if you were an imposter, you wouldn't have imposter syndrome. Because imposters do not get imposter syndrome.
They're just imposters. And they typically know that they're imposters. They might still have the same fear of getting caught one day, but they know that they're imposters. They're not doubting their ability. They know they're faking it. So imposters don't get imposter syndrome because they're just imposters.
So if you are struggling with imposter syndrome... You also need to know that that's a good sign that you're not actually an imposter.
So I'm going to give you some tools, some ways of thinking about imposter syndrome a little bit differently, to help you change your thinking about it and to help build up your confidence. Imposter [00:04:00] syndrome really thrives when we don't feel confident. So let's work on our confidence today and talk about some ways to shift our thinking.
So the first thing is to embrace the journey. Everybody has to start somewhere. Everybody in your field had to start somewhere. And everyone had to be a beginner at some point. Today, I started running for the first time. Well, the first time in probably about 10 years, I went for a run. I've always told myself I hated running because I didn't like the feeling of being a beginner.
I didn't like being slow at it or just not being good at it at the beginning. And that's kind of silly, really, because how can you be good at something when you're just starting? We need to give ourselves permission to be new at something and to struggle at the beginning. So I have changed my thinking about running by allowing myself to become a beginner.
And I did this by listening to one of my client's podcasts that's soon to launch [00:05:00] called Plucky Not Perfect. And she talks all about running. And I'll put, you know what, I'll put the link in the show notes because Maybe, maybe you want to start running to her podcast. Talks about running for people of all stages in their running journey from beginners to pro athletes.
And 1 thing that she talked about that really hit home for me. was that slow is a pace and if you run, you're a runner and that's all I needed to shift my thinking to allow myself to just start. I've always wanted to enjoy running and to be a runner, but I've always felt like anytime I put my shoes on and I started running, that self talk would kick in that you're not very good at this.
This is really hard. You're running so slow. It's awkward. It's embarrassing. But today I was able to go for a run with that beginner mindset. So embrace the journey wherever you are on your journey. is just fine, and we all have to start at zero. The [00:06:00] second one, master your mindset. High performers know that their mindset is absolutely key to achieving anything.
And they have the ability to turn those thoughts of, I can't, into, I have the skills. I have the skills to learn. I can figure it out. So if you feel like right now you're not good enough or if you have those plaguing thoughts of I'm not good enough, rewire your thinking and a great way to do this is through hypnosis.
Now, of course, in this episode, I can't teach you hypnosis. I am a hypnosis trainer, but I can't teach you how to do that here. What I would suggest, though, is that if you want to try hypnosis to rewire your brain and to change your self belief, Then I would suggest trying an app like Aura or find a local hypnotherapist who can help you one on one.
Aura is a great resource with lots of hypnotherapists on there [00:07:00] with great resources, tools and downloads. And I'm on there as well. So it's a little plug for Aura, but there's tons, there's, there's many hypnotherapists and coaches on there that you can choose from or simply book a consultation with me and see if we can work together.
The third one is celebrate your wins. There's no win that is too small. And the more that you celebrate and acknowledge your wins, the more you are rewiring your brain and you're training your brain to focus on what's good, to focus on the abundance, focus on your achievements, to focus on success instead of focusing on maybe the things that were hard or the things that you've struggled with.
And so every time we acknowledge and we celebrate those wins, we're rewiring our brain to focus on what you want, which is. More wins. The next one, number four, is to set realistic goals. Listen, imposter [00:08:00] syndrome absolutely thrives when you set unattainable goals. So let's go back to my running example. If I set the goal to run a marathon next week, and I'm going from not being a runner to saying I'm going to run a marathon next week, do you think that my unconscious mind would believe that's possible?
Now, I'm not saying that running a marathon is unattainable for me, but running it in a week from going from zero, not running two in a week, not a great goal. Imposter syndrome thrives when we set unattainable goals. So make sure your goals are realistic. We still want to stretch ourselves, and we still want to set really big goals, but make sure that you're giving yourself enough time, and that the goal is actually realistic for you.
It's attainable. So, running a marathon next week, not attainable for me, not [00:09:00] realistic, but running one maybe in a year. Very attainable and achievable. I'm not saying I'm going to do that, by the way, so don't hold me to it, but that's just an example. So we take these big goals and then break it down into what is an actionable step?
What can you achieve along the way and give yourself some milestones to achieve? So maybe with running that first one is to be able to run continuously. For 20 minutes or to do a 5k and then maybe the next goal is to run a 10k and then maybe the next goal is to run more of the 10k and take less breaks through it and then maybe the next one is a half marathon.
You see where I'm going with this. Break it down into what's achievable and doable for you. And then you're also establishing those wins along the way. You get to celebrate every time you reach a new milestone, you get to celebrate it. So instead of just setting the really big goal, which are important, we still want to [00:10:00] set big goals.
Break that big goal down into steps so that you have more to celebrate and more little steps to achieve along the way. And that's going to help to cancel out the imposter syndrome.
You know, I think that often. We think that we have to know everything. You're never going to know everything about anything. There's always more to learn and more to discover. One of the challenges about overcoming imposter syndrome is that we get into this pattern or, you know, sometimes we compare it to other people who are ahead of us in the journey.
One of my mentors says it's like you're on A flight of stairs of 10 stairs, and this flight of stairs is always moving up. So if you move up a step, the whole flight moves up a step and imagine now that you are always on stair number 5 of this 10 step staircase. If you're always [00:11:00] on step 5, that means there's always people behind you on the staircase.
Those are the people you're here to help. Those are the people you coach, you mentor, you encourage, you inspire, you influence them. So you help the people who aren't as far on the journey. And then the people who are ahead of you on this journey, step 6 through 10, those are the people you learn from. The mistake that we often make is we compare ourselves to those people ahead of us and say, well, I'm not, I'm not doing well enough because look at, look at what that guy's doing or look at what she's up to.
I'm not there yet. But they had to go through the same journey that you're going through. Might've looked a little different, but they had to learn just like you are. You're not here to help those people. You are not here to be those people. You are here to learn from them and to help the people who are not as far along in their journey as you.
So let go of comparisons. We're not here to compare to anyone. The only person you can really compare to is who you were yesterday. [00:12:00] And as long as you're continually improving and developing and working on yourself and growing, then you will always be getting better and stronger. And there's no need to worry about imposter syndrome.
You know, and in terms of building confidence, I think it's also important to look at who are you surrounding yourself with? Do you have a community of people around you who are supportive, who are there to cheer you on? Or do you have people in your life who are constantly tearing you down and belittling you?
Because that also feeds into imposter syndrome. So I hope you found this helpful today. This is just a shorter episode this week. I've been on a little bit of a break from the podcast, and, uh, you know, enjoyed the last bits of summer, but now I'm ready to dive back in. So if you have any thoughts about imposter syndrome, or any questions about this episode, I'd love to hear from you.
Feel free to reach out to me by email. Or drop me a message on Instagram. That's my, that's, that's [00:13:00] where I am the most on social media. So if you have any questions or any thoughts that you'd like to add to this conversation, I would love to hear from you. Thank you so much for listening to this episode and I hope you have a fantastic day.